Saturday was my adorable granddaughter’s first ballet recital. Yup, a star is born. As I watched her confidently dancing in her beautiful blue costume my heart swelled with pride and joy. It seems like only yesterday it was my Lexi up there performing. Where did the time go?

Flowers? For me?

After the show as we filed out of the auditorium to wait with flowers for our little celebrity I ran into a couple of Alexis’s friends from high school, now with little stars of their own.  It seems like only yesterday these very women were only girls whispering and giggling on the phone together. Where did the time go?

If I close my eyes, become very still and think back I can almost remember the feeling of being on the stage myself; the smell of backstage, the camaraderie of my fellow performers and the bonding ceremony of putting on our stage makeup. Where did the time go?

As my mother and I crowed about how fabulous our Kenzi did the conversation drifted to a time in my mother’s past when she danced for her father with her dance class at the veteran’s hospital, just before her father died. She still remembers her mother sewing special velvet dots on her costume wings when the other girls only had ink spots on their wings. Where did the time go?

As I write this post I wonder if Alexis knows how special these times are and is she really taking the time to really savor the moment.  Not just the photo image but all the details of the glorious and juicy emotions of these mile markers.  There will come a time when she will say where did the time go?

Mile markers, are you counting them? Are you really taking them in? Are you making moments?

But more importantly…is there something more you want to do? Is there something you’ve been waiting to do “when the time is right?” Don’t wait, time flies, do it now. Five or ten years from now you will be looking at photographs and saying, where did the time go?

Time is our most precious commodity. Find your passion. Unearth those buried desires and dreams and start now. If you wait for the perfect time it will never come.

“Don’t do nothing because you can’t do everything.  Do something.  Anything.”

 Colleen Patrick-Goudreau

Role Models

I just had to share! I just downloaded this shot of Poppy, (the little one) and Shealy Ann, (the bigger one) after being “sprung” from the laundry room.

 
Even though they were not present for the session they both are glowing examples of how to pivot out of a negative spiral after an unplanned or unpleasant occurrence. Now I’m not sure if they were able to find anything positive about the temporary confinement but they both appeared to be catching up on some sleep when I opened the door. However I am positive they were able to completely  leave the incident in the past. After a quick treat both were happy and ready to play!

Also wanted to thank all of you who are attending the workshop and for all the wonderful emails! If you missed this workshop not to worry  new workshops are coming soon!

Until then, enjoy these insightful thoughts that were emailed to me some time ago that were so profound I kept them for sharing at an appropriate moment. If you’ve read them before they are worth a second read:

What dogs can teach us

If dogs were teachers, you would learn stuff like….

· When loved ones come home, always run to greet them.

· Never pass up the opportunity to go for a joyride.

· Allow the experience of fresh air and the wind in your face to be pure ecstasy.

· When it’s in your best interest, practice obedience.

· Let others know when they’ve invaded your territory.

· Take naps.

· Stretch before rising.

· Run, romp, and play daily.

· Thrive on attention and let people touch you.

· Avoid biting when a simple growl will do.

· On warm days, stop to lie on your back on the grass.

· On hot days, drink lots of water and lie under a shady tree.

· When you’re happy, dance around & wag your entire body.

· No matter how often you’re scolded, don’t buy into the guilt thing and pout…run right back and make friends.

· Delight in the simple joy of a long walk.

· Eat with gusto and enthusiasm.

· Stop when you have had enough.

· Be loyal.

· Never pretend to be something you’re not.

· If what you want lies buried, dig until you find it.

· When someone is having a bad day, be silent, sit close by and nuzzle them gently.

Author unknown, but whoever you are…. thank you!

What did I discover? Here are a few answers to my own questions:

1. What did you do in lieu of watching TV?
   • I mowed the front lawn at 5:30 in the evening. This is definitely unusual!
   • I finished a couple of half read books.
   • I spent a couple of wonderful evenings with my granddaughter, mom and daughter.
   • I took the time to revisit my goals/vision journal and found myself adding to it!
   • I actually cooked myself a meal, lit a candle and enjoyed a leisurely glass of wine.
   • I used some of my evening time to meditate and breath.
   • I listened to some of my favorite inspirational tapes.
   • I took the time to dust off and ride my bike with my friend!
2. How did you feel?
   • Very anxious at first.
3. What did you like about it?
   • Eventually the incredible awareness of myself and surroundings.
   •  I did not feel mentally or physically tired or exhausted at night.
4. What did you dislike about it?
   • I found it very hard to turn off my thoughts to sleep!
5. What surprised you about this experience?
   • I was very surprised at the amount of “found time” I discovered.
   • I was also shocked at the amount of TV I had been watching and how unaware of it I was.
6. Do you think it made a difference in your mood or attitude?
   • I felt better and had more energy.
   • It was not so much that I was happier and more positive, which I was, but more importantly that I was much more in touch with what I was feeling whether it was good or bad.
7. And of course… did you cheat?
   • Just twice!!!!!

So how did you do? You know you don’t need a challenge to try this experiment. You can start enjoying the sound of your thoughts whenever and as often as you like.

Now for the rest of the story… visit this week’s e-zine. Here is the link to the page http://www.womenintransitiononline.com/current-issue

If you are not currently receiving the bi-monthly e-zine and would like to:

Here is the email link http://www.1shoppingcart.com/app/join.asp?merchantid=160571

Take the Challenge!

Are you going to join me?  Pledge to not watch TV for 7 DAYS, or whatever you think you can manage! I am posting this today thinking most of you probably won’t read this until tomorrow sometime. I have received a couple of emails with some pertinent questions and suggestions surrounding this event and I will share them with you below:

Suggestion: A couple of you felt a better start date, with the weekend approaching, would be Monday.

I agree, and really, you should start your pledge on whatever day you think will work best for you! For me the weekend is the time when I typically am out and about a lot I and watch the least amount of TV. If you think it would be easiest to give up TV during the week this, is what you should do!

Question: A couple more of you felt a week might be a little aggressive and wondered if committing to less time to start would be advisable.

Again, Good Point! I have done this before on a couple of occasions so I guess I am less apprehensive. You should all do whatever feels right for you. I can tell you it does help to have a partner or friend to share the experience with. The one thing I noticed on the two occasions I have done this is the amazing amount of found time I had and the quandary of what to do with it all.

Whatever you do, I hope you will share your experience, as I will, in the comment section at the end of this post. Every time I do this I swear I am not going to watch TV EVER Again!! But like all bad habits; it’s so easy to fall back into them so refresher courses are great! I have found that I fall back into the bad habit when I feel the need to watch something positive, like the Olympics, or something I feel is very important, like the President, Republicans and Democrats purposing to discuss health care… that’s not really what I saw but it was an interesting experiment in human behavior, or misbehavior!!!! But I try not to discuss politics or religion. My motto, to each his own!

Anyway, when I do indulge in something I think is positive, I find, via commercials, I get plenty of negative messages in the process!!! But like kicking any bad habit; if you fall off simply start again. Eventually you will find less of a need for a refresher course and you will be ready to sell your TV!!!!!!

If you want to publicly commit, sign up in the comment section at the end of this post or feel free to email me at deborah@womenintransitiononline.com.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!BEST OF LUCK TO US ALL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

P.S. If you missed the previous post about this event and need further instruction, scroll down to the I Dare You…dont listen post.

Anyway, in one of those emails was a GREAT IDEA for a fun experiment… hence the dare:

Take the Challenge

NO TV?

Starting Thursday, March 4, 2010 I dare you/me to turn off the television for 7 Days! That’s right no TV. Keep a little personal journal and send in your observations about this experience.

• What did you do in lieu of watching TV?
• How did you feel?
• What did you like about it?
• What did you dislike about it?
• What surprised you about this experience?
• Do you think it made a difference in your mood or attitude?
• And of course… did you cheat?

 If you are game sign up in the comment section. On March 4th I will write a post announcing that start of the dare. We can share our thoughts  by returning to this post and commenting throughout the week, or whenever you feel like it.

Can you give up television for Seven Short Days out of your life?

 Come on, have some fun with this and take the dare! Pledge your commitment today!!

It sounds so simplistic and yet the results that can be garnered from following this advice are nothing short of staggering. Like all habits, developing the “habit of not watching TV” can be harder to do than one might think. I find myself easing back into catching a piece of news here and there and suddenly realizing I’m kidding myself and tuning into the news each night. Once I recognize this I can actually see the difference in my attitude, creativity and energy level and trace it back to the day I began to plug myself into this incredible powerful negative feed.

Too Much Television

Of course it’s understandable. Marketers, ad agencies and big business have spent billions discovering ways to addict us and it starts at earlier and earlier ages. (cartoons/toys) As it succeeds it is delivered in larger and larger doses. (More on this in my next ezine article) Let’s just agree that tuning out negativity, whether it is from television or unsupportive people is hard to do but the results are well worth the effort.

So…if I don’t watch TV or News wouldn’t it have been possible to miss the inspiring piece below?

Surround yourself with positive thoughts and people and positive information will find you!

Such was the case when I watched this inspiring video recently featured on ABC News that was linked in an email I received! This arrived on a day I really needed to be reminded that:

It’s the journey. Follow your passion and success will be the likely destination.

Click here, http://abcnews.go.com/GMA/HealthyLiving/odds-dancing-cerebral-palsy/story?id=9596192 and take five short minutes to be inspired. You’ll love this I promise!

P.S.  I’d love to know if it reminded you of something you needed to hear, and of course, what that might be. It’s easy, just click on the “leave comment link at the end of this post or feel free to email me at deborah@womenintransitiononline.com!

Even though you shouldn’t wait for an occasion it just so happens this is the time of year when holiday celebrations happen every month.  So you have no excuse not to spend some quality time basking in the glow of acceptance with your friends.

Here are two great party ideas that need no occasion to bond with your friends and have some fun!

The Diva Party

Attire:

We all have at least one of these ensembles in our closet don’t we? You know the ones. We don’t remember why we bought it but we must have felt really good about ourselves that day. We thought wow I look good. When we took it home it became the where am I going to wear this outfit that we never found the nerve or occasion to wear! Well that’s the makings of the perfect diva party.

Make sure everyone knows and is willing to wear that certain fabulous thing they never or seldom wear. If by some chance they don’t own anything like this, they should. Tell them to think thrift store! Encourage them to be inventive. Maybe it’s those incredible pink high heel  boots they just had to have that have been sitting in the closet  collecting dust but the thought of tossing them into the giveaway box is unbearable.(Ask me how I know about these.) Maybe it’s the hat they love but never wear because no one wears hats these days. These are the makings of the perfect Diva Outfit.

Now that you have the attire down the rest is easy.

• Purchase some photo frames. I suggest a two sided frame but two separate frames per guest are fine too.
• Purchase  small photo albums for each guest attending.   
• Give out disposable cameras for everyone to take candid shots of the party.
• It’s a good idea to purchase a couple extras of these, you never know who just might bring along another friend)
• Add some food and drinks and let the party begin!

Take a “before” picture on arrival and an “after” picture on the departure of each guest. There will be a difference in demeanor I promise you!

After the party print and place the before and after photo of each guest in the two sided frame and make a  small companion photo album of the best candid shots to give to everyone who attended the party. Memories of good times are always appreciated!  

The Attitude Adjustment Party

• Purchase and decorate  good sized lidded jars with each guest’s name on it. You can make them simple or get creative; use glitter, ribbons and glue buttons or rhinestones on them.
• Prepare a festive table with some flowers and a tablecloth to place the jars up on.
• Get some colorful card stock squares and fun pens to write with and place these supplies in festive little bags to give to each guest. You might want to ask each person write their name on the bag so they won’t lose it during the party!

Ask each guest to write an anonymous compliment or thought about why they think their friend is fabulous for each person at the party and place it in their jar at some point during the party.   At the end of the party each person takes their feel good jar home to read the compliments at their leisure. A perfect party favor that will surely be kept and inspire everyone. As they say, the gift that just keeps on giving.

These parties can be elaborate or a simple pot luck. These are our friends. The important thing is to honor the friendship and enjoy each other. 

Bonding with your friends is so important for your attitude, your survival and even your health! There are plenty of people who will say you can’t, you won’t, you aren’t, and you shouldn’t; you run into these people every day. It is from your friends you will hear you can, you are, you should and you will. So with the season of holiday’s arrival it’s the perfect time to have some fun. Take the time – it’s important and you’ll be glad you did.

• It would be sooo nice if you would share some photos of your fun event and any ideas for fun friend gatherings as well. I’d love to post them here!
• If you receive this post via email and have trouble viewing it or would like to comment or contribute please click this link and visit the site. http://www.womenintransitiononline.com/blog/ When you get here grab those friends and sign up for the free Attitude Adjustment E-course; it’s fun, it’s easy and it works! 

 It is my great pleasure to introduce you to Mrs. Kim Blakey.

 Her Pearl of Wisdom

 “No matter how hard life gets there is so much to learn from all of it;

 Just look ahead and face the new beginnings.”

 Kim Blakey

What do you do for work? I am a Service Rep for a Collateral Protection Insurance Company for 29 years! I have been based out of Fort Worth, Texas but have worked in El Paso. I love my job and I love the people I work for.

What have you accomplished in life that you feel proud of? I have accomplished a very happy marriage for 25 years and have two absolutely wonderful, beautiful daughters that I just adore. I am proud to have been able to maintain a full time career while raising my children in a happy stable home :)

What is important to you now? What is important to me now is maintaining good health and happiness.

 Do you have any hobbies or passions? I guess my hobbies are seasonal. Right now I enjoy working in my yard and gardens.

 What do you do for fun? My husband is a musician and I love to go with him and listen to him play guitar and sing :)

 What is your favorite book? The Bible.

What is your favorite movie? Gone with the Wind!

What is your favorite food? Mexican Food (green chicken enchiladas with an egg over easy, refried beans, guacamole and of course the yummy margaritas)

 What do you do when you really want to pamper yourself? Go get a massage, maybe get in touch with old friends and go back in time at some really neat resort and have manicures, pedicures, massages, good old laugh sessions and of course the wine.

Tell us about your life To answer this question I will begin with a little about my life as a child and bring you up to my current ripe old age of 52!! (But I like to reverse this, which would make me only 25 and I like the sound of that better :). I don’t want to be negative but I do want to be truly honest about my life. I don’t believe it was negative all the time I just believe some of us are dealt a harder life than others.

 I was raised in an alcoholic home. There was love in the home but it was not unconditional; or what I feel unconditional love in a family should be. There were four daughters, my mother and my father. When I was just 15 years old my father committed suicide and left us all to take care of ourselves. We didn’t know it then but we had been taking care of ourselves the whole time.

 As time went on my older sister committed suicide at the age of 32. I believe in my heart that the devastating loss of two family members to suicide due to alcohol, drug abuse and a dysfunctional upbringing would be enough to bring any person down. I am proud to say I chose the complete opposite.

I knew it was going to be a challenge but I wanted to find a loving husband and to raise a family in the most “normal” household setting possible. What motivated me to accomplish this was my love of God. No matter how hard life gets there is so much to learn from all of it!! I have truly been blessed with the love of my life and our two absolutely precious daughters.

Now I am facing more changes. I think they call it the “empty nest” syndrome! It is hard but I know there is a new horizon. I will just look ahead and face the new beginnings.

I would like to thank Kim for sharing her story with us.  As I read this and the stories that will follow in this monthly edition I realize that we women of a certain age are indeed  diverse, strong, growing, fabulous and creative and we all share a unique and valuable resource.

• I hope you find these stories inspiring . Now we want to hear about you.  Click on the  You’re Beautiful Submission link above; share your story and tells us how you are reinventing your life!

Happy Monday to you.  Women in Transition Online is undergoing a facelift! During this transformation, no pun intended, I found myself in need of a little INSPIRATON.

This video and subsequent campaign is not new.  If you are not already familiar, it started years ago with a video about a gentleman named Juan Mann from Australia and his simple desire to be hugged and to make others smile.   It was a huge success with national coverage and even today racks up hits and comments on you tube.  It was his desire to spread the campaign and message and a number of “Free Hugs” campaigns were mounted and filmed. The one below is from Hollywood, California and is one of my favorites. I love the song used and no matter what is happening in my life, when I watch this or any of the free hugs campaign videos I can’t help but smile and feel inspired. I hope it does the same for you. Enjoy.

  If you receive this blog via email and want to view this video click on the link below.
http://www.womenintransitiononline.com/blog/

I hope you are having a fabulous day!

Warmly,

Deborah Hayes

It is my great pleasure to introduce you to Mrs. Christine Sherriff.

                                                     Her Pearl of Wisdom:

 Now, at almost 61 years of age, I have found there are many chapters in one’s life and each chapter opens another.  Dreams are achievable…never impossible if one puts their mind to it. 

The Many Chapters of My Life:

As a child, I was extremely introverted and shy, which possibly added to my introspective nature.  I grew up with two sisters; one was a twin.  My family life was about as Ozzie and Harriet as a family could get.  I married my sweetheart within two weeks after turning 20 years old and then motherhood came within a year which completely changed my focus and priorities on life.  I also found myself not only being a homemaker and mother; I also worked in the medical field for nearly 20 years.  As time progressed, I changed my vocation just before I turned 40 years old and became a Housing Rehabilitation Specialist assisting low income homeowners renovate their homes under a city funding through a HUD Grant program.  I stayed in government work for almost 10 years. 

During my last couple of years heading the Housing Rehabilitation program I became immersed in the Mind, Body and Soul aspect of Life and Health.  I followed my dream and went to school to become a Massage Therapist.  Now at the age of 50 I was developing an interest in “Healing Touch” using Energy Work as my primary therapy.  I found I had a gift with intuitive healings, along with working with Tarot cards.  I realized there is more to intuition then I ever imagined!  I also became interested in writing poetry; which has helped me to recognize my inner feelings and have given me more of an insight and an appreciation for my many blessings. 

During the time I was enjoying a new vocation I was diagnosed with what was thought to be Essential Tremor and I founded the first Essential Tremor Support Group in Arizona from 1999 to 2003. Several years later I discovered I had been misdiagnosed. What was thought to be Essential Tremor was actually Parkinson’s disease. My physical challenges have taught me patience and understanding of not only my own “opportunities”, I have been also given the privilege of meeting many who have met greater hurdles than I.

I believe spending less time thinking about me and more time thinking about others creates more personal growth and feeds my emotional and spiritual being.  I have come a long way from the introverted and shy person I was as a child; I have grown and continue to grow.  I still haven’t completely decided what I want to be when I grow up…all I know is that I have been blessed!