Our shoulders are broad and strong. We are blamed, admired and revered in fairy tales as both wicked and kind and we are the fodder for countless jokes; consequently a number of comedians likely owe their success to us.  Indeed attempts to define our enigma can be seen from books to the physiologist’s couch and still our mystery remains.

This day always brings back the childhood memory of the “breakfast in bed” tradition for my mother. In fact I can still smell the bacon and recall with detail the bustle as my father and all of my siblings contributed to the breakfast effort and the tiny kitchen it occurred in. I remember the excitement as my Dad carried the final results on a tray with a little flower down the hall as we all followed to surprise my Mom with the annual feast. Right on cue she feigned surprise and delight while I am sure she wondered what she would find to clean up in her kitchen and the effort it took for her to stay in bed and listen as the commotion ensued!  I also remember being scolded by the family to not eat Mom’s breakfast and my secret delight as I stayed behind, snuggled next to my mom as we shared her special treat! I thought I was so sneaky and yet, everyone really knew!

Memories, we all have them. And so it comes again. That time when we try to show our Mom’s our appreciation for all the years, good and bad, that we shared,  what we bring with us today and what we have passed on to our own children.

I had such fun collecting what I feel are some of the BEST quotes and sayings about Moms. I hope you take a moment to read these and experience a sense of inspiration.

Take a seat and enjoy!

“Though motherhood is the most important of all the professions – requiring more knowledge than any other department in human affairs – there was no attention given to preparation for this office.”

–Elizabeth Cady Stanton

“And so our mothers and grandmothers have, more often than not anonymously, handed on the creative spark, the seed of the flower they themselves never hoped to see – or like a sealed letter they could not plainly read.”

–Alice Walker

“It was when I had my first child that I understood how much my mother loved me.”

From “For Mother – A bouquet of Sentiments”

“It is not until you become a mother that your judgment slowly turns to compassion and understanding.”

–Erma Bombeck

“What took me by surprise is the way I feel when her face lights up when I walk into a room because I am her world and she is mine. Being a mother is like taking your heart out of your chest and watching it walk around.”

–Author Unknown

“The greatest thing she’d learned over the years is that there’s no way to be a perfect mother, but a million ways to be a good one.”

– Author Unknown

“When a child enters the world through you it alters everything on a psychic, psychological and purely practical level.”

–Jane Fonda

“Motherhood is not for the faint-hearted. Frogs, skinned knees and the insults of teenage girls are not meant for the wimpy.”

–Danielle Steel

“Now, as always, the most automated appliance in a household is the mother.”

–Beverly Jones

“The lullaby is the spell whereby the mother attempts to transform herself back from an ogre to a saint.”

–James Fenton

“Grown don’t mean nothing to a mother. A child is a child. They get bigger, older, but grown? What’s that suppose to mean? In my heart it don’t mean a thing.”

– Toni Morrison

“The story of a mother’s life: Trapped between a scream and a hug.”

–Cathy Guisewite, “Like Mother, Like Daughter”

“Adorable children are considered to be the general property of the human race. Rude children belong to their mothers.”

–Judith Martin

“People always talked about a mother’s uncanny ability to read her children, but that was nothing compared to how children could read their mothers.”

–Anne Tyler

“A vacation frequently means that the family goes away for a rest, accompanied by mother, who sees that the others get it.”

–Marcelene Cox

“Children seldom misquote you. They more often repeat word for word what you shouldn’t have said.”

–Mae Maloo

“Mothers are fonder than fathers of their children because they are more certain they are their own.”

–Aristotle

“It kills you to see them grow up. But I guess it would kill you quicker if they didn’t.”

–Barbara Kingsolver

“When you are a mother, you are never really alone in your thoughts. A mother always has to think twice, once for herself and once for her child.”

–Sophia Loren, Women and Beauty

“Mothers hold their children’s hands for a short while, but their hearts forever.”

–Author Unknown

“A mother’s arms are more comforting than anyone else’s.”

– Diana, Princess of Wales

A little girl, asked where her home was, replied, “where mother is.”
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                  — Keith L. Brooks

“A daughter reminds you of all the things you had forgotten about being young. Good and bad.”

–Maeve O’Reilly

“There is a point at which you aren’t as much mom and daughter as you are adults and friends.”

–Jamie Lee Curtis

“Be a first rate version of yourself, not a second rate version of someone else.”

–Judy Garland, to her daughter, Liza Minnelli

“No matter how old a mother is, she watches her middle-aged children for signs of improvement.”
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                    — Florida Scott-Maxwell

“Youth fades, love droops, the leaves of friendship fall; a mother’s secret hope outlives them all.”

–Oliver Wendell Holmes

A hundred years from now…it will not matter what my bank account was, the sort of house I lived in, or the kind of car I drove…but the world may be different because I was important in the life of a child.”

–Kathy Davis

“Children should be taught not the little virtues but the great ones. Not thrift but generosity and an indifference to money; not caution but courage and contempt for danger; not a desire for success but a desire to be and to know.”

–Natalia Ginzburg

“A mother is a person who seeing there are only four pieces of pie for five people, promptly announces she never did care for pie.”

–Tenneva Jordan

“If at first you don’t succeed, do it the way your mother told you to.”
                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                  — Author Unknown

“Motherhood brings as much joy as ever, but it still brings boredom, exhaustion and sorrow too. Nothing else ever will make you as happy or as sad, as proud or as tired, for nothing is quite as hard as helping a person develop his own individuality especially while you struggle to keep your own.”

–Marguerite Kelly and Elia Parsons

“What would men be without women? Scarce sir, mighty scarce.”

–Mark Twain

• According to the US Census Bureau there are 82.5 million mothers in the United States.
• Mother’s Day is widely reported as the peak day of the year for long distance telephone calls.
• Mother’s Day is the busiest day of the year for many restaurants. (Try and get in one on Sunday!)
• Retailers report that Mother’s Day is the second highest gift-giving holiday in the United States (Second to Christmas).

I hope you enjoyed these thoughts and quotes offered by and about mothers throughout time. We are many and we are special. When Mother’s Day arrives take a moment to appreciate yourself and all the mothers in the world for the important caring work we do every day of every year.

Happy Mother’s Day

 to you all

 Deborah Hayes

I have spoken of her before. She has always been a special person who dances to the beat of her own drum and whatever “dance” she is dancing, her passion is palpable and the consequent good results seem effortless.  To know her is to love her.

Over the past few years she has experienced a great deal of change in her life; some by circumstance and most by design. Indeed, what she has endured would sideline many. To be brief, a sudden and unexpected health issue that nearly killed her and took her short term memory and livelihood and a relationship that ended suddenly. But instead of giving in she continued with her passion for life, Tango Dancing, and looking forward.

The Cinderella Part

There came an opportunity for two lengthy visits to Argentina to submerge in the culture and most importantly, Dance the Tango to her heart’s content. Of course she grabbed it. It was on one of these visits that she met the special someone.  Although their physical time together was brief that magical “thing” that is so unexplainable; a knowing, an intuition that this is right grew after her return. Now she glows and seems to be in a joyous, private and impenetrable place.

Her handsome prince has asked her to join him in Argentina and for her hand in marriage. In fact, he has come to take her to the home he has prepared for them. She is selling her home here, an incredible unique place filled with interesting treasures collected and created over the years that so clearly speak to who she is. She seems delighted to spread her possessions among her many friends first and then the rest will be sold off.  There is no sign of regret. She is taking only what she needs for her new life in a small number of suitcases and an even smaller amount that will be shipped. She will enjoy smaller accommodations in the city; a liberating walk/live lifestyle without the burdens of excessive belongings. There is no sign of hesitance; she radiates a calm self assured peace and joy that is in a word… enviable.

The Risk

Her friends are many and each with their own version of well intentioned concern.  Shouldn’t she rent her home for a while to see how this turns out? Shouldn’t she go and get to know him better before she takes such irreversible actions?  What if she needs help? She will be so far away from all of us who love her.

I spent a day with her a while back and discovered that her thinking is not as impetuous as it might seem. Of course she is aware that this might not be a happy ever after but she is not going to focus on it. She has weighed the advantages and disadvantages of her decision and has come to what is right for her. There are, after all, opportunities that come with living in and exploring a culture she loves whether the relationship lasts or not. Bottom line, she could stay “safe” and shackled to “things’” and a life she has outgrown or risk, thrive and shape a life that is more of who she is now.

Now I’m not suggesting you and nor am I ready or in a position to wipe the slate clean and start over. We are all different and unique. Although my friend has always danced to the beat of her own drum, even she admits this is a drastic albeit exciting move.   But it does clearly illustrate to me that in order to discover, change and grow we must be willing to set aside our fears and risk. For it is in this risk, whether large or small, that growth and the opportunity to live a life of consequence, a life without regrets can occur. It is what makes life rich, interesting and keeps us alive and thriving!

Congratulations my friend! I wish you joy and happiness in your new life!

“And if not now, when?”
– TALMUD

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

TO YOUR DREAMS

1. Number 1 priority – TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF. If you’re stressed and exhausted you can’t enjoy anything. This can lead to a lower immune system, feelings of resentment and a short fuse. Plan now to get a massage, manicure/pedicure sometime during this season. This is the ideal time to force you to start that morning walk ritual. A few moments alone in the fresh air can really help you center and relax. Here are some other excellent ideas to keep handy and relax:

1. Drink plenty of water and stay hydrated. My friend Sharon shared this excellent recipe for a wonderful detoxifying water drink:

Sassy Water

81/2 cups water

1 teaspoon freshly grated ginger root

1 medium cucumber, peeled and thinly sliced

1 medium lemon, thinly sliced

12 mint leaves

Combine all ingredients in a large pitcher and chill in the refrigerator overnight. Leave all ingredients in the water thereafter. This is really good so be sure to try it.

2. We are likely to be on our feet a lot more than usual and we all know what this can do…. Here is an easy foot bath to refresh, revive and invigorate your tired aching feet after a long day of work, shopping or entertaining.

Refreshing Foot Bath

1 sprig of fresh rosemary with leaves

5 or 6 drops of tea tree oil

Fill a metal or plastic container that is large enough to comfortably fit both of your feet in with warm to hot water, depending on your comfort level. Make sure the container is large enough so the water will reach your ankles when you put your feet in. Break up and sprinkle the rosemary leaves into the water. Add the tea tree oil and gently swirl them into the water. Sit in a comfortable chair, place your feet in the bath, put your head back and relax and enjoy!

We should all remember to pamper ourselves throughout the year but during this hectic season that can test our strength and reserves it is imperative to give yourself extra time and attention. Make time, it’s important.

1.     Planning. Part of the problem is we tend to think in the big picture and leave out the number of hours and time involved in our plans and we may not have the unlimited funds and army of helpers available to complete the tasks. Realize that your holiday gatherings do NOT have to be perfect. And really isn’t the perfect holiday the one where everyone had a wonderful time. (That includes you.)

• Plan now to let your family contribute to making this season a special one. Allowing family and friends to contribute will make them feel important, included and most people really appreciate the opportunity! Everyone has a special pie, dish or talent they would love to show off and share!
• Consider setting the holiday table up a day or so early with a family member or friends who also enjoys this activity. This could become a holiday ritual and bonding opportunity!  I always cover the masterpiece with a sheet until the day of the dinner.
•  Commit to being flexible with schedules ahead of time. Get in the flow of the holiday and be willing to let go of a planned activity that doesn’t happen and don’t stress if the dinner does not come out on the exact hour you planned.

2.     Speaking of traditions and rituals. Every holiday does not have to be the same. Sit down now and choose which of your traditions are the most important to you and leave the others for another time. You can then do the job justice and will have the energy to really make it special and enjoy it. Keeps things familiar but fresh with a new idea or two.  Try to size down a bit, think Quality not Quantity. And remember all those magazines and TV shows have a number of unseen heads and hands, (staff) that make works of art a reality.  Here are a couple of enjoyable ideas to enjoy and can actually help you with the process at the same time.

•  Have a cookie decorating afternoon. Invite your guests to an afternoon of making cookies. Everyone can bring cookie making supplies and decorate the cookies for your family gatherings. Get a goofy gift and blind vote for who made the coolest cookie.
• Include an evening of fun free holiday entertainment. Cook popcorn and watch a traditional favorite holiday movie or a drive around town to look at lights. Visit a museum or an art gallery. How about a pretty drive and stop for some hot chocolate along the way. Very relaxing and a chance to spend some quality time with loved ones. Grab your girlfriends or relatives and head for the mall and get a picture made with Santa. Rollerblade together or take an evening walk through the neighborhood and then share some Christmas cheer afterward. Be creative; sometimes the simplest activities are the best.
• Christmas wrapping parties with friends can be fun also. Gather some friends have them bring some of their presents and supplies and wrap presents together! Great conversations and ideas are born in the process.

3.    BUDGET. This is an annual problem and is the number one stressor for the holiday season. Make a gift budget and stick to it. That way you won’t feel dread during the process and want to shoot yourself after it is over. Do what you need to do to stay in that budget. Draw names or reduce the number of presents you give to each person. Do some homemade gifts. There are many ways to cut back here. Offer your time or expertise in a certain area, gardening or cooking a meal or house/dog sitting and give your loved one a coupon to be used when they need it in the coming year. Many of these things are of great value to someone and often times more appreciated than anything else you could give!   

And lastly, this year I am determined to make my shopping experience pleasant and not simply another pressure. I am going to do as much of my shopping as possible online and EARLY! I have already started my list and the best of what I have found is below. There are unique gifts for everyone and maybe some of these ideas will be perfect for the loved ones in your life.

Unique Gifts and Fab Finds:

Primula Flowering Tea Set with 40-Ounce Pot with Glass Lid 

 This is a beautiful gift for anyone who loves the ritual of a relaxing cup of tea. When placed in  water the tea balls gracefully open into a delightful flower. Enchanting!

Meditation Bowl Box, Red Lotus; 3″

Take your meditations to a new level and get inspired with this singing meditation bowl. I love the image of the vining lotus on the box, symbolizing the full flower of wisdom, on the box.

Columbus Washboard 3020 Galvanized Washboard, Teak 12-7/16×23-3/4 Inches

I love collecting and tinkering with musical instruments. It seems to open some sort of gateway to my creative side!

DVD-Folk Rhythms-Learn To Play Spoons,Bones,Washboard,Hambone and the Paper Bag

Of course it will be helpful to have some intruction! This DVD covers other methods for early American music. The spoons… now wouldn’t that be fun!

AeroGrow AeroGarden with Gourmet Herb Seed Kit

What a fabulous idea! I am trying to eat more organic and fresh foods and have discovered the incredible flavor in fresh herbs. This item is on my Christmas list!

Prepara Herb Savor

Just in case Santa doesn’t bring me my Aerogarden… I thought this herb savor was a great idea. Fresh herbs do have a tendency to go bad quicker than I can use them and this will extend their life in my fridge. It seems well worth it when you consider the expense of fresh herbs at the grocer! 

Norpro 5-1/2-Inch Garlic Baker

Yum! Garlic is so good for us. Who doesn’t love the taste and smell of roasted garlic. I usually do mine on the grill so this will be perfect on those days that is impossible. It’s oven and microwave safe!

The Garlic Lovers’ Cookbook, Vol. II

I read the reviews on this book and do plan to purchase this myself. There is talk of a stuffed mushroom recipe that sounds delicious.

Fred & Friends Cool Jazz Ice Cube Trays Set of 2

These are just cool. What a great stocking stuffer.

Fred Toothpick Holder, Ouch Gray

Now this is cute. A great conversation piece and a fun gift for the person who has everything!

Polar F6 Women’s Heart Rate Monitor Watch (Pink Coral)

New Years resolutions are upon us and it will soon be time to get in shape. My daughter has this monitor and she wears it as a watch all the time. It looks great, waterproof and she loves it.

Bongers Massage Tool

This is the perfect massage tool to relieve stress,tension and tight muscles. Best of all, you can use it on yourself !

Basic Knead Reflexology Sox – Form Fitting Foot Socks for Massage Therapy

Wait until you see the picture for this item! It feels good just looking at them.

Sonoma Lavender Spa Blankie

Hmmmm. The soothing calming scent of lavender. This shawl size blanket is like floating in a piece of heaven. You can microwave it for fragrant mood elevating warmth or freeze it to soothe sore muscles and the cover is washable. Your loved one will thank you for this one.

Sonoma Lavender Eye Mask

I used to have a lavender eye mask and I wore it out. It really does relax you after a long hard day. This one has the advantage of a washable case!

Bonsai Boy’s Starter Kit
Make Your Own Bonsai Tree

 The art  of growing one these mystical trees require patience and care and is said to be a peaceful and rewarding experience. If you have a plant enthusiast on your list this kit includes everything the beginning artist will need. A gift the keeps on giving!

Bonsai (101 Essential Tips)

The perfect companion for the Bonsai Starter Kit to get your Bonsai enthusiast off on the right foot.

Sunrise Earth: American Sunrises (3pc) (Ws Ac3)

How about a little relaxation. I love tuning in to Sunrise Earth but often miss it as it is on EARLY. This DVD creates a wonderful peaceful environment for your home anytime during the day. Incredible scenery and the sound makes you feel as if you are there! I highly recommend any of the Sunrise Earth DVDs.

The Green Book: The Everyday Guide to Saving the Planet One Simple Step at a Time

Speaking of the EARTH! I know we are all concerned about preserving our earth’s beauty and resources for our future generations. This book is full of easy ideas to incorporate into our lives to help to just that.

The Creative Fire

I love anything by Clarissa Pinkola Estes but I am in awe every time I listen to her.  She has a true gift for story telling. My latest reads are about encouraging our creative instincts and I know this will be inspiring. This is not a new recording but I do not own it, as yet! It is at the top of my Christmas list. Heloooo, Alexis, are you listening?

The 12 Secrets of Highly Creative Women: A Portable Mentor

I am in the process of reading and enjoying this book. It is full of tips on how to nourish and evoke our creative instincts. It would be a wonderful gift for any of your female friends or loved ones. If you don’t happen to have or receive this special book I would recommend you get it for yourself! 

I had way too much fun shopping for these gifts. I hope you find something wonderful  for your special person.

Enjoy your Thanksgiving Day! I hope you spend it surrounded by those you love and are filled with the gratitude of all that you have and all that you are.

HAPPY THANKSGIVING

Even though you shouldn’t wait for an occasion it just so happens this is the time of year when holiday celebrations happen every month.  So you have no excuse not to spend some quality time basking in the glow of acceptance with your friends.

Here are two great party ideas that need no occasion to bond with your friends and have some fun!

The Diva Party

Attire:

We all have at least one of these ensembles in our closet don’t we? You know the ones. We don’t remember why we bought it but we must have felt really good about ourselves that day. We thought wow I look good. When we took it home it became the where am I going to wear this outfit that we never found the nerve or occasion to wear! Well that’s the makings of the perfect diva party.

Make sure everyone knows and is willing to wear that certain fabulous thing they never or seldom wear. If by some chance they don’t own anything like this, they should. Tell them to think thrift store! Encourage them to be inventive. Maybe it’s those incredible pink high heel  boots they just had to have that have been sitting in the closet  collecting dust but the thought of tossing them into the giveaway box is unbearable.(Ask me how I know about these.) Maybe it’s the hat they love but never wear because no one wears hats these days. These are the makings of the perfect Diva Outfit.

Now that you have the attire down the rest is easy.

• Purchase some photo frames. I suggest a two sided frame but two separate frames per guest are fine too.
• Purchase  small photo albums for each guest attending.   
• Give out disposable cameras for everyone to take candid shots of the party.
• It’s a good idea to purchase a couple extras of these, you never know who just might bring along another friend)
• Add some food and drinks and let the party begin!

Take a “before” picture on arrival and an “after” picture on the departure of each guest. There will be a difference in demeanor I promise you!

After the party print and place the before and after photo of each guest in the two sided frame and make a  small companion photo album of the best candid shots to give to everyone who attended the party. Memories of good times are always appreciated!  

The Attitude Adjustment Party

• Purchase and decorate  good sized lidded jars with each guest’s name on it. You can make them simple or get creative; use glitter, ribbons and glue buttons or rhinestones on them.
• Prepare a festive table with some flowers and a tablecloth to place the jars up on.
• Get some colorful card stock squares and fun pens to write with and place these supplies in festive little bags to give to each guest. You might want to ask each person write their name on the bag so they won’t lose it during the party!

Ask each guest to write an anonymous compliment or thought about why they think their friend is fabulous for each person at the party and place it in their jar at some point during the party.   At the end of the party each person takes their feel good jar home to read the compliments at their leisure. A perfect party favor that will surely be kept and inspire everyone. As they say, the gift that just keeps on giving.

These parties can be elaborate or a simple pot luck. These are our friends. The important thing is to honor the friendship and enjoy each other. 

Bonding with your friends is so important for your attitude, your survival and even your health! There are plenty of people who will say you can’t, you won’t, you aren’t, and you shouldn’t; you run into these people every day. It is from your friends you will hear you can, you are, you should and you will. So with the season of holiday’s arrival it’s the perfect time to have some fun. Take the time – it’s important and you’ll be glad you did.

• It would be sooo nice if you would share some photos of your fun event and any ideas for fun friend gatherings as well. I’d love to post them here!
• If you receive this post via email and have trouble viewing it or would like to comment or contribute please click this link and visit the site. http://www.womenintransitiononline.com/blog/ When you get here grab those friends and sign up for the free Attitude Adjustment E-course; it’s fun, it’s easy and it works! 

Who of us does not have immediate family members or precious friends who have been touched by this dreadful disease? According to the World Health Organization fact sheet cancer is the leading cause of death worldwide with breast, lung, stomach colorectal and cervical listed as the most frequent types affecting women.

There is good news. This same report asserts that 30% of these deaths to cancer could be prevented by avoiding key risk factors and early detection.

As we age the risk for cancer increases; it is only wise to avail ourselves of the best and latest known methods for prevention and early detection. For starters, please click on this link and read this concise informative fact sheet with information on prevention, early detection and treatment.

http://www.who.int/mediacentre/factsheets/fs297/en/index.html

 Here are the top five risk factors to avoid or modify :

• Smoking and tobacco use
• Weight control
• Modify our diets with higher intake of fruits and vegetables
• Of course, exercise!
• Watching our alcohol use.

An equally important factor for reducing the risk of cancer is  early detection and knowing the symptoms!

We women are so busy caring for others we often forget the importance of taking care of ourselves.

So….

Remind the ones you love!

Click the share button below and email this reminder to all the women you care about to:

                                                Get Educated and Get Checked!

• Throughout the month of October I will be recommending useful books on the subjects of health and the value of friendship in our lives. If you have a favorite book on either of these subjects please share it with us in the comments below or email me at deborah@womenintransitiononline.com.
• If you are having trouble reading this email, you can view it online here: http://www.womenintransitiononline.com/blog/

To your Health and Happiness!

My quick research on the internet yielded an array of answers as to when our bodies produce it.

When we are:

• stressed
• giving birth
• in pain
• having sex
• eating chocolate (small quantities recommended)
• eating spicy foods (as in chili peppers)
• exercising vigorously
• feeling happy
• smiling
• Laughing (not the golf clap kind)
• meditating
• “low to moderate” drinking (as in alcohol)

 It’s that wonderful euphoric feeling when everything is right in your life and you just feel good. Like when you fall in love and can’t wait to see and be with that certain someone or hold your new grandchild for the first time. The question often asked is how to keep these endorphins rolling in our bodies and generate more of them when we need them.

This past weekend I stumbled upon one very pleasant method.

I was recently blessed to be contacted by my long lost friend, Kim, from my home town who I had not seen or heard from in years. She in turn connected me with our other good friend, Sharon, who had also moved away and not returned home for many years. After some communication via internet and phone we all decided it would be a fine idea to plan a reunion of sorts. It was agreed that Sharon and I would travel home and stay with Kim for a weekend and catch up on each other’s lives.  What I had expected to be a simple fun excursion turned out to be something far more rewarding.

“Though our communication wanes at times of absence, I’m aware of a strength that emanates in the background.”

-Claudette Renner

 From the moment I walked into Kim’s comfortable and inviting home, speckled with mementos of all  things dear to her that speak to the special person she is, I felt at home again. It was a perfect place for sharing and reclaiming important parts of ourselves at a time in our lives when we most need to remember.

The Reunion

 Over the way too short weekend we shared memories, laughter, triumphs, disappointments, concerns, praise, recipes and remedies. We bought matching readers and granny chains so we could see each other’s treasures without the need to search for eyes to see and magical tennis shoes to make us stand straight, transform our calves, thighs and bums. It was just like the good old days and as if the many events and circumstances lived over a block of 20 years time had not passed. In the end… we enjoyed the comforting mutual appreciation of not who we were or what we’ve become but of what we are; that part of us on the inside that despite all that occurs in our lives remains the same. Endorphins flew like hundreds of butterflies emerging from their chrysalis.

So if you’re looking for endorphins and to touch that soft mushy marshmallow part inside you that sometimes gets lost in all our trials and tribulations; find your friends and spend some quality time with them. Sometimes we get so caught up with the business of life we neglect to nurture the very thing that will enrich our lives and sustain us; an enduring friendship.

“A friend is someone who knows the song in your heart, and can sing it back to you when you have forgotten the words.”

- Sent by Donna Robert

• What does friendship mean to you? I’d love to hear your thoughts in the comments section below. Share with us!

Happy Monday to you.  Women in Transition Online is undergoing a facelift! During this transformation, no pun intended, I found myself in need of a little INSPIRATON.

This video and subsequent campaign is not new.  If you are not already familiar, it started years ago with a video about a gentleman named Juan Mann from Australia and his simple desire to be hugged and to make others smile.   It was a huge success with national coverage and even today racks up hits and comments on you tube.  It was his desire to spread the campaign and message and a number of “Free Hugs” campaigns were mounted and filmed. The one below is from Hollywood, California and is one of my favorites. I love the song used and no matter what is happening in my life, when I watch this or any of the free hugs campaign videos I can’t help but smile and feel inspired. I hope it does the same for you. Enjoy.

  If you receive this blog via email and want to view this video click on the link below.
http://www.womenintransitiononline.com/blog/

I hope you are having a fabulous day!

Warmly,

Deborah Hayes

I find it inspiring to see athletes who have found the strength and devotion to excel and succeed at what they love to do.  As I watched the best of the best I began to ponder what set these athletes apart from what must be thousands of tennis players aspiring to become the best.

Surely there were moments, months and periods of time when they were discouraged and tempted to “give up.” During these matches there were a number of interviews with some of the coaches of these fine athletes and I noticed something that each kept mentioning. Aside from work ethic, conditioning and skills there was often the mention of belief and attitude.

 After hearing that mentioned throughout the day I tried watching some of the close matches with that perspective in mind.  I began to notice subtle differences between two players who were very closely matched in skills.  There came a point in those long games where the one who allowed the possibility of losing to enter their mind lost the match. As I watched from this perspective I could see the moment in body language, facial expression and attitude. At times when the opponent would have spurts of revived success it was obvious the victor, regardless of the score at the moment, was convinced he or she would win. Regardless of what was happening in the match the winner looked and waited for the next opportunity to better apply their skills. The one who seemed to refuse to consider loss and never gave up ultimately became victorious. The winner possessed a one pointed focus and beief that never wavered.

The second thing I noticed; these athletes refused to focus on or discuss any recent or present injuries or problems. In every pre- game interview attempts to get the athlete to comment on or discuss the issue was flatly denied!  

After watching several of these matches with this point of focus I began to make the important connection of belief, attitude and focusing only on the positive in all aspects of our lives.

As for the loser, the commentators often spoke of players reviewing these matches to discover parts of their game that need improvement and working on them for the future.

“When we seek to discover the best in others, we somehow bring out the best in ourselves.”

William Arthur Ward

As you move through your day focus on looking for and adopting the positive things you want in your life. The more positively you think the more positive your life will become. The choice is ours!

•  NEW  DOWNLOAD!!!  Relax and visualize your dreams.  Register for a site account and download your FREE mp3 Guided Visualization Meditation.

TO YOUR DREAMS

As the years tick by and the roller coaster we call life continues on its nonstop ride it is easy to forget to take stock of what’s on the inside. It only makes sense. We do it for our financial well being. We do it for our health with regular visits to the doctor for checkups. Why is it that we don’t make a concentrated effort to look at our life, goals and level of happiness with equal diligence?

Here are ten big questions that might help you to illuminate what you are feeling about your life. Take some quiet time alone when you are comfortable and relaxed and answer these questions.  Write as much as you want; write freely and without self consciousness.  Use as much space as you would like and take as much time as you need. (You don’t have to finish this in one setting.)These questions are designed to expand you! No one needs to see this but you so be as honest with yourself as possible.

Ten Big Questions

1. What is working best in your life right now?

2. What is the most challenging aspect of your life right now?

3. What do you like about yourself?

4. What one aspect of yourself would you most like to change?

5. Are you willing to change it now?

6.  What motivates you?

7. How do you deal with “failure” or making mistakes?

8. What typically holds you back from going after what you want?

9. What one big thing do you want more of in your life?

10. What are you willing to do to get it?

Before you can change something in your life you have to know what it is you want to change. You have to get absolutely clear with yourself. Find what it is that you want; not what society says you should want to make you happy. Taking the time to discover what you really want and why you haven’t achieved it are the first big steps towards getting it.  Once you clearly define this you can devise a plan. You can get passionate about it. You can focus on it, expand your ideas, and find the tools and people who can help you. You can develop a pattern of certainty and believe it is inevitable…. and achieve it.

“There is nothing with which every man is so afraid as getting to know how enormously much he is capable of doing and becoming.”

Soren Kierkegaard (b. 1813, d. 1855)

Answer these questions! You might be surprised at what you discover!

v   NEW  DOWNLOAD!!!  Relax and visualize your dreams.  Register for a site account and download your FREE mp3 Guided Visualization Meditation.

TO YOUR DREAMS

It involves quieting your mind as in meditation and creating a clear vivid picture of what you want in your mind. The idea is to repeatedly and positively think about your mental picture adding more and more details to it until it becomes very real to you. As you allow your imagination to expand your picture you actually feel yourself having it, touching it, using it and hearing what people will say to you when you obtain it; until you see and feel it actually exists. You are consciously creating a movie picture in your mind and with enough positive feeling and repetition it will become a strong belief, real and attainable. With enough positive energy and focus it manifests in your life.

Whether we acknowledge it or not, we all have experienced this to some degree or another. From simply believing and knowing we would find that “close in” parking space in the packed lot at Christmas time to nailing that interview or presentation. It’s those times when everything about the event seemed to feel smooth, right and effortless from beginning to end.

This is not a new phenomenon.  There are many wonderful books devoted to the subject of visualization. If you are interested in changing anything in your life this practice is worth trying. I am currently re-reading two books listed below as references on the subject and I have found them really helpful in my attempt to master this skill but you may know of or find others you would prefer. I do recommend you find something on the subject to help you as this is a big subject and there is certainly a lot more to it than I have shared here.

Does it work? I believe that it does.  The secret ingredient to make it so: Belief. Regardless of what method or path you take to change your thinking or life you must, at a minimum, be open to the idea that it could work. I also share the opinion and have personally experienced the reality that we believe, accept and change only when we are ready to do so. In my life and in hind sight I can recognize there were many things previously available to me that I simply was not ready to hear, see, acknowledge or accept. We all grow in our own directions and at our own pace. I have come to realize for me that is one of the things that makes this world so interesting.

I can truthfully say that if you do choose to give this an honest try I know the change in the way your life is moving can be dramatic. I knew a man who I am now convinced exemplified and perfected this visualization process. At the time, this was many years ago, he was said to be magnetic, charismatic, dynamic, crazy, lucky and even a genius. (The last one on the list he shamelessly enjoyed and promoted)  I used to say he was the luckiest and most positive person I have ever known. As I look back on him now I truly believe what he was actually doing, unbeknownst even to himself, was visualizing his dreams and goals with total unwavering conviction and belief. No one could penetrate his certainty and confidence in whatever goal he chose. Although his life was shorter than it should have been, he lived every minute of it completely and for the most part joyously surrounded by many who simply wanted to be near the powerful energy.      

Of course this sounds so easy but quieting the mind if you are stressed, worried, anxious or feeling less than confident about yourself can be quite a feat. This brings me to the tool I discovered which, although also not a new technique is something I have never previously explored and one I am currently finding useful to assist me with my visualizations. It is an article on self hypnosis and a technique called Best Me I found on wikihow.com. It is a short but well written “how to” on self hypnosis in conjunction with visualization and I am having some pretty good success with this! Perhaps you will too….

http://www.wikihow.com/Hypnotize-Yourself-Using-the-Best-Me-Technique

It is also a fabulous aid for relaxing, relieving stress and insomnia!! Good stuff. Check it out.

“Your vision will become clear only when you look into your heart. Who looks outside, dreams. Who looks inside, awakens….”

                                                                                                                                                           Carl Jung

v  I hope you found this article useful and if you enjoyed it please don’t forget to bookmark it on delicious or email it to a friend. Your support is appreciated!

Outside resource:

§  Book: Creative Visualization, Shakti Gawain

§  Book: Mind-Power, William Walker Atkinson