Meet Deborah Hayes

I read the results of a survey somewhere that struck home for me. It said that the majority of “us” feel 10 years younger than our chronological age. It reminded me of a phone conversation between my daughter and a mutual girlfriend. Alexis’ birthday was coming and our friend asked her how old she was going to be. She said, “I ‘m going to be 31 years old” as if that were really old. And without thinking I blurted out, “Your 30??” Of course everyone on the call laughed but for me it was a light bulb going off. I knew Alexis was 30 and I was 56 but the actual number didn’t really register each year. I wasn’t mentally adding a number each year for her or me. It was more of the living. It was more of what to get her, how we would celebrate and finding a time in our schedules that was convenient for us all.

Where did the time go? I think this happens to a lot of us and suddenly we are looking at the second half of our lives which are supposed to be the best years. Whether it happens by design or circumstance there is a point in our lives where we are actually ready to think it, plan it and live it. Now we know that time is precious.

For me, the moment in time was by circumstance. After experiencing a multitude of roles, daughter, mother, wife, (twice), grandmother, business owner, (three times) and ultimately a successful real estate career, I got it. For years I stayed so busy and focused on climbing for the next rung on the ladder to solidify my retirement I missed the subtle and obvious signs. About the last 5 years of my real estate career I realized that I did not love what I was doing but I was good at it and the money was good. I was so consumed and busy I didn’t have time for much else but work. During that time I began to look inward, sort of. I began to read, study books and take courses on coaching, transformation, balance, contentment, joy and happiness with the intent that this would serve me well when I was financially ready to “do what I really wanted to do”. And like the phone call it never occurred to me that the time was now. If you believe that there are no accidents, and I do, fate stepped in and forced me to really look, feel and think. The real estate market CRASHED and then steadily disappeared.

The realization that my time was NOW didn’t sink in right away. It took some time for me to overcome the habit of living on auto pilot and face the fear of flying on my own. When I did, for the first time since my youth, when life was more about the small things and full of possibilities I stopped, listened, began to live in the moment and understand what I had been studying. The small things really are the big things. It’s true in relationships and marriage, it’s true in child rearing, it’s true in friendships and it’s true in life.

When I started my coaching practice and began to work with other women of a certain age I came to realize I was not the only one who had become accustomed to living on auto pilot; without a real concept of who I was and numb to what I really wanted. I began to see the faces of other women as they peeled away the layers to discover what was important to them now, the realization of who they were underneath the years of conditioning and the resulting possibilities they discovered for themselves. It was exciting and I came to realize there was something much bigger here than I had imagined, for you and for me!

This site was created for all the strong, growing, fabulous, creative women “of a certain age” in this world. We are a powerful force.

“You don’t get to choose how you’re going to die. Or when.
You can only decide how you’re going to live. Now.”
JOAN BAEZ

 

Please don’t hesitate to share comments, stories and topic suggestions. Contact me at deborah@womenintransitiononline.com

I look forward to hearing from you…

Warmly,

Deborah Hayes
CTA Life Coach – midlife transitions, empowering women
Providing tools to transform Midlife to Bestlife

Deborah Hayes, CTA Life Coach

Empowering women to live a life of consequence, a life without regrets that is your own unique version of the life you love. About Deborah

480-656-2026
deborah@womenintransitiononline.com